


I need

by leooX



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Overdosing, Sad, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Trans Character, vent - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-10-11 19:19:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10472238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leooX/pseuds/leooX
Summary: Something to kill me.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I guess you could call this a vent fic eventhough everything i write is.

Tyler was tired of being called ' _Aimee_ '.  
He was tired of being called ' _she_ '.  
Tired of thinking of ways to not be called that, not be here anymore.  
Tyler was tired of searching up ' _the best way to kill yourself_ ' on Google and only finding people trying to convince him not to.  
He was tired of watching suicide stories on YouTube to get pointers on how he could try it himself.   
Tired of cutting open his flesh because people said it made you feel _something_. He felt _nothing_.

He was tired of his mind telling him to do things he didn't want to.   
Because _something_ would happen, but he wasn't sure what.  
Pills didn't make him forget- they made him vomit and writhe in his bed, a cold sweat on his forehead. He never regretted it, and the next week he'd do the same thing again.

He was tired of people not understanding.  
 _Why do you want to be a man?_  
 _Why would you want to have a dick?_  
 _Why would you cut yourself?_  
 _Why would you take pills? What do you get out of it? Why do you make yourself ill?_

Why do you want to kill yourself?

Tyler wanted to kill himself, because he was born in the wrong _body_ with the wrong _family_ , in the wrong _world_. The world was against him and it always was.

Tyler would kill himself.   
Because nobody understood why he wanted to do what he did.  
He'd find the perfect way to end his life and he wouldnt say goodbye to anyone. He wouldnt say goodbye to Josh- the boy of his dreams. But that didn't exist. He wasn't real, no matter how much Tyler wished he was. He understood and he called him a boy and he didn't care when he screamed and hit himself.

He'd find a way to he happy.

But for now, he'd down too many anti depressants and pain killer with vodka or cold water, and he'd pedal in his bed and vomit up his hopes and dreams

**Author's Note:**

> I hate myself ha


End file.
